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Cross-posted from hetachallenge

Title: Are We There Yet?
Characters: Germania (Vati), Roma, chibi!Prussia, chibi!Spain, chibi!France, chibi!Romano, chibi!Germany, Chibi!Italy
Challenge: Holiday Winter Challenge - 31 Fics in 31 Days (Travel)
Rating: G
Summary: Vati and Roma get in the wagon and take the “kids” on a trip to Euro Disney…
Author’s note: part of my chibi!Prussia AU

For Missy…

“Behave back there!” Germania called out as he drove the wagon down the road. They were traveling towards their mythical destination known as “Euro Disney” and he had a raging headache. Germania was ready to kill his best friend, Roma, who was sitting next to him, oblivious to the puppy pile of young countries in the back and the noise they were making. Germania’s eldest, Prussia, had taken a huge liking to the two countries Roma had adopted, Spain and France, and the three were an inseparable bundle of boundless energy and naughtiness.

“Hey, Vati! Are we there yet?” Prussia called out.

“No!” Germania said with more force than he wanted, as he regretted not bringing Herr Switch with him.


“I know!” Roma said, “Let’s sing that song Prussia taught us!”

NO!! Germania thought miserably. Anything but that again!!

“Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall, ninety-nine bottles of beer!” Roma sang. “Take one down, pass it around…”

“NINETY-EIGHT BOTTLES OF BEER ON THE WALL!!” the young countries chorused.

Shoot me now… or crucify me… anything, but having to listen to this again for next hundred kilometers… Germania wanted to cry.


Somewhere along the sixty-sixth bottle of beer, there was a cry of “EWW! Romano farted!!” followed by said country bursting into tears. The cries of “Romano is a baby! Romano is a baby!!” made Germania want to pull over to the side of the road and go hunt down a Herr Switch to end all Herr Switches. If he had to go drag the whole tree over to get a bit of peace and quiet, then by Odin, Germania was going to cut down a whole forest! He pulled over anyway and glared into the backs of the wagon. The quiet that suddenly descended was deafening in its intensity. Even Roma had shut up.

Germania took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Now,” he said with deadly calm, “who has to go to the bathroom?”

“I DO!! I DO!!” The younger countries began to scramble out of the wagon.

“WAIT!” Germania roared. “You will not go farther than that tree over there, cuz if I have to spend a minute hunting you boys down, I swear I’ll turn this wagon around and we’ll go home! Understood?”

“YES, Vati/Patruus!” the younger countries chorused.

“Good.” Germania got out of the wagon to stretch his legs and use the tree as well. “Let’s go,” he said and followed by his “troops” they made their way to the tree, leaving Roma behind to watch the wagon. When everyone was finished doing their business, they went to the wagon to wait for Roma to have a turn. While they waited, Germania let the young countries run around, burning off some of their energy. Ten minutes later, they back on the road again.

The trip continued in the same fashion, with cries of “Are we there, yet?!” being broken by loud choruses of “Ninety-nine Bottles of Beer on the Wall.” Only Italy and Germany played quietly in the back of the wagon. Romano cried most of the time as he was too old to play with the younger countries and too young for the triumvirate. Nighttimes at an inn, found on the way, were the only time Germania found any peace and quiet on the trip, until Roma started snoring. By the time they reached their destination, Germania’s nerves were shattered. He was so keyed up, he wanted to lay siege to the place and burn it to the ground, until realized it was deadly quiet in the back of the wagon. Fearing one of the young countries had fallen out; he whipped his head around to give them a quick count, when he saw the look of pure awe on their faces. A smile slowly spread across his face.

“See?” Roma said, “I told you this was a magical place.” He grinned. “Now let’s say we park this thing and go have some fun?”

Germania nodded. “Let’s go, boys!” he said as they herded the younger countries out of the back of the wagon. As they walked towards the entrance to the park, he had a sneaking suspicion this was going to turn out to be the best trip ever!


the Duchess of Crack! and the Queen of Fluff

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