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Cross-posted from DA

Title: Beware of Greeks and Their Gifts
Fandom: Hetalia
Author: kira
Chars/Pairs: Kiku (Japan) & Herakles (Greece)
Genres: bromance
Warnings: none
Word Count: 2122
Summary: Herakles brings his friend Kiku a gift…
Author’s note: Thank you to my beta, Jen, for pinking this & helping me come with a good gift…

Kiku and Herakles liked to meet once a month to have a cup of tea or coffee and discuss their “book of the month.” This month was the Iliad and Kiku was eager to go over it with his friend. Kiku took out the briki Herakles had given him. The small pot was used to make Elliniko café and Kiku had to admit it tasted must better in the traditional pot than it did the first time he tried to make it in one of his small saucepans. He also had a mix of Greek and Japanese confections to go with it, which he arranged on a plate. After making sure everything was ready to his satisfaction, Kiku sat down to wait.

Herakles soon arrived; his backpack slung over one shoulder and a bottle of ouzo in his other hand. “Hey, Kiku,” he said in greeting. “I come bearing gifts,” Herakles said with a smile.

Kiku bowed politely. “Thank you, Herakles-san, and please come in.” He smiled as he reached out to help his friend with his things as he entered his home.

“Here,” Herakles said as he handed over the bottle. “It’s ouzo. I remembered how much fun we had when you brought me that bottle of sake.” Herakles smiled.

Kiku blushed at the memories. “That was fun, wasn’t it?”

Herakles nodded. “It goes really good with octopus too. I was kinda hoping we could make those lil balls, you know, with the sauce.”


“I think that’s what it’s called.”

Kiku made a little sound of agreement. “I can’t make them at home, but we can order them from this place I know of that’ll deliver.”

“Cool. How about while we wait we make some mezedes? You must have stuff we can make salad out of.” Herakles put his backpack down and headed towards the kitchenette, Kiku following in his wake, the bottle of ouzo clutched tightly in his hands. “And have you got any sardines, or anything else to eat?”

“Well, I was going to serve some of that coffee you gave me and I did make some teacakes. I even made a few Greek ones that I hope you’ll like.”

Herakles nodded. “I’m sure I will; thanks.” While his friend called the takoyaki place, he busied himself making some tidbits to soak up the alcohol in the ouzo. While they had fun that time with the bottle of sake, he knew ouzo was a lot stronger and Kiku seemed like such a lightweight, so Herakles wanted to make sure they did things properly and drank on a full stomach.

Twenty minutes later, the two of them sat Kiku’s kotatsu, the heater having been turned off last month and the cover removed, now that it had warmed up, to reveal the beautiful hardwood that was now covered with a variety of plates full of finger food. Herakles poured them each a glass and he waited, before drinking, for Kiku to raise his.

Kanpai!” Kiku said and they both drank. They picked at the array of food before them. They drank as they ate, washing the food down with mouthfuls of ouzo.

Herakles refilled their glasses, adding a bit of water to them from the carafe Kiku had put on the table. “To water it down so it’s not so strong. Ouzo has a way of creeping up and biting you on the ass.” He sniggered and Kiku politely laughed. Lifting his glass he said, “Stinygiasou!”

Kiku lifted his own glass and with nod to his friend, he drank.

The two of them ate and drank in this manner and when the doorbell rang, signaling the arrival of the takoyaki, they both lurched to their feet and went to answer it. Kiku took the food and as he reached around for his wallet, his friend said, “I got it.” Herakles fished out his wallet. Opening it, he took out a few euros, handing them to the delivery boy. “Uh… arigato,” he said, smiling drunkenly at him.

Douitashimashite,” the delivery boy said. He looked down at the euros in his hand. “Ummm…?”

“I’m sorry,” Kiku said. Handing the food over to his friend, he pulled out his wallet and exchanged the euros for yen. “You know, since this is Japanese food, I think we should get dressed in yukata. Unless you don’t want to…”

“No, that sounds like fun,” Herakles said with a smile. “It’s hot in here, like it was back home, and maybe we can go to a festival or something tonight.”

“Yeah… although, I don’t think there’s anything going on…” Kiku thought it over. “Tanabata is not ‘til next week, but I’m sure we can find something.”

“Yup!” Herakles hiccupped.

The two of walked back over to the kotatsu, and after shooing Tama away from the plate of sardines, they wandered into Kiku’s bedroom, shedding their clothes along the way. By the time they reached the bedroom, they were both in their underwear. Kiku’s tie was also tied around his head, as neither one of them could figure out how to untie it. He looked like a drunken business man who had gotten the wrong idea about a geisha. Herakles was standing there, completely nude, and looking like a classical Greek god in Kiku’s humble opinion. Flustered, Kiku stared at his friend, blinking owlishly at him.

“I wanna wear those fundies we wore last time,” Herakles said. “You know, the ones that look like a diaper,” he giggled.

“Oh…” Kiku blushed and looked away. “You mean a fundoshi?”

“Yeah, so where’s the fundies and can you help me with it?”

Being the good host that he was, Kiku hurried to do his friend’s bidding. “Here, and watch me,” he said shyly as he handed a fundoshi to his friend. Kiku took off his tightie-whities, and standing there just as naked as his friend, he began the process of putting on the fundoshi.

Herakles watched intently, noting through his slight buzz, the lines of his friend’s slim body. He reminded him of Ganymedes, a handsome youth who was the cup-bearer of the gods. He was so lost in thought that it was several minutes before he realized his friend was talking to him. “Hunh?”

“Do you need any help?” Kiku said as he tucked the end of his fundoshi in.

“Please.” Amid much giggling and blushing on Kiku’s part, Herakles soon found himself dressed in the traditional Japanese undergarment. After they had both donned a yukata, Herakles dragged his friend back to the dining area, where they continued to eat and drink.

Kiku was grateful for the assistance in walking. A sudden bout of dizziness hit him and as the hallway tilted on its axis, he clung to Herakles. He blushed every time his friend looked at him with soulful eyes whenever Herakles asked if he was alright. As they staggered back to the kotatsu, Kiku tripped over his own two feet and if Herakles had not been holding on to him so tightly, he would have fallen face first to the floor.

“You okay, Kiku?”

Hai… Yes…” Kiku tilted his face upwards just as Herakles was looking down at him, meeting him halfway for a sloppy kiss.

Opa,” Herakles said when he broke the kiss.

“Oh-p-pah…” Kiku breathlessly repeated. He blushed under the intensity of his friend’s gaze. Smiling to cover up his discomfiture, he looked away as he drunkenly made his over to the kotatsu and sat.

Herakles sat opposite him. He refilled their glasses, making sure to water the ouzo down by splashing a bit of water into the glass. Picking his glass up, he toasted his friend’s health again. “Stinygiasou…”

Kiku picked up his glass and said, “Kanpai…”

They drank. The Iliad forgotten, the two of them rambled on about everything and nothing, from the Olympics to anime to the story of Jason and the Argonauts to Kurosawa Akira films. By the time the conversation had turned to wrestling, half the bottle of ouzo had been consumed.

Clad only in his fundoshi, Kiku was trying his hardest to explain the art of sumo wrestling to his friend, with his poor cat, Tama, standing in as his opponent. Each time he lifted a leg to stomp the floor, Tama would hiss and run for it. Herakles’ cries of “Opa!” every time Kiku “won” had the effect of giving both friends a bad case of the giggles. When Herakles proposed teaching Kiku the art of pankration, a style of wrestling similar to mixed martial arts that was part of the original Olympics, Kiku readily agreed. Since it was similar to Japanese Pancrase, he had a fair idea of what to do.

“We need to get totally naked, Kiku,” Herakles said with all the solemnity of the very inebriated. “It’s how they used to do it in the first Olympics.”

“Yeah?” Kiku said.

Herakles nodded, instantly regretting it when the room began to spin. “Yes.” He tugged on his fundoshi, trying to untie it.

Kiku got up and quickly shredding his own, staggered over to help his friend, completely unabashed in his nudity. The two made quick work it, despite the giggling and hands wandering where they should not have, and it was not long before they were both naked and ready to face off against each other. However, since both combatants were highly intoxicated, they wound up in a tangled heap on the floor when their “match” started.

They laughed as they lay there, entwined in each other’s arms, the two them silently cursing the fact that the room was spinning. Every time Kiku’s dog Pochi barked at them, a new round of laughter bubbled up from the remains of their chortling. It did not take long for the two to pass out. They spent the night, snoring softly as they cuddled each other on the cool, hard tatami mats as the alcohol slowly metabolized out of their systems.

When dawn broke the next morning, casting a soft rosy hue over Kiku’s main living area, he woke up feeling very hung-over. Herakles’ soft snoring sounded like a buzz saw in his head. He none too gently pushed his friend off him and sat up. Kiku was horrified to find the two of them were naked, especially since he could not remember too much of what went on last night.

Herakles groaned when he cracked open his eyes. “Kiku?” he rasped, his throat feeling drier than the Sahara. Slowly pushing himself upright, Herakles sat up and yawned.

“What?” Kiku groaned as he lurched to his feet. He rubbed gingerly at his throbbing temples. Spotting his yukata he walked over to it, picked it up and shrugged into it. He found the obi nearby, and closing his eyes to ease the pounding in his head, he picked it up and tied it on. Dressed, he felt a bit better about hearing what his friend had to say.

Herakles was also hung-over, but he still managed to chuckle softly at himself and at the events of last night that were pretty hazy, although, he had the feeling he remembered slightly more than his friend. “We were both pretty shit-faced last night.”

“Yeah…” Kiku retrieved Herakles’ yukata and obi, and while averting his eyes as much as he could, he handed them to him. “Here, you should get dressed, while I clean up.”
Herakles got to his feet and shrugged into it. He tied his obi like the belt on a bathrobe, and now that he was dressed, he noticed Kiku had relaxed. “Leave it; we’ll get to it later.”


Herakles grinned.


“I was just thinking.”

“Yeah? About what?” Kiku said as the two of them made their way over to the kitchenette.

“About yesterday and what they say.”

Kiku raised his eyebrow. “What do they say about yesterdays, beside ‘all my troubles being so far away’?”

Herakles laughed. Well, that wasn’t what I meant, but it fits too.”

Kiku smiled. “So what were you thinking?”

“I was thinking about the Iliad, which I don’t think we ever got around to discussing.”

“No, we didn’t… or at least I don’t think so.” Kiku gave him a pained smile.

“It’s okay, but it would have been very apropos since it deals with the Trojan War.”

“I’m not following you,” Kiku said as his features contorted in a puzzled frown.

“Beware of Greeks bearing gifts…” Herakles said.

“Beware of Greeks bearing gifts…” Kiku repeated. His eyes going wide he said, “Oh…”

“Yeah. I promise next time I do bring you a gift, it won’t be as potent as the ouzo.”

“Thanks,” Kiku said.

“You’re welcome,” Herakles said as the two friends looked around the kitchen for something to ease their hangovers.


( 2 comments — Leave a comment )
Mar. 18th, 2014 01:20 am (UTC)
I love the way the two cultures are balanced in this fic. ♥
Mar. 18th, 2014 01:27 am (UTC)
Thanks! I tried hard to do that & I'm glad you liked how it came out. :D
( 2 comments — Leave a comment )


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